I hope you’re doing well.
So, you need reassurance? Today seems to be the day where you really feel like you’re doing a rubbish job. Or maybe you’re a person who has a mummy friend who needs reassuring? Either or, make way for the reassurance guru (me!).
Look at them. Simply just look at them. Whether they’re crying, sleeping, smiling, laughing or just plain grumpy; stare at them. You created him/her. He/She is half of you. How wonderful. Maybe they’ve been crying for the past hour and you’ve really struggled to settle them. You start to feel as if they just don’t like you, and you’re making things worse. Stop. You’re the best person EVER in their eyes. They love you SO much. No love could top the love you both have for each other. Unfortunately, they’re just having a crappy day. It could be for all sorts of reasons; teething, attention, hunger, wind, colic; the list goes on! You feel as if you’ve tried everything over and over again, and to be honest, as hard as it is to admit; you’re at breaking point. Whether you’re single or have a partner; you feel like the loneliest person on earth. You’re definitely not alone, and every parent experiences these emotions at least once in their new life.
There have been a few times these past 2 months where Harlow has been crying and I haven’t been able to find the reason, and I’ve literally just sat with her, held her, and cried. It was a messy situation. Both crying and just feeding off each other’s sadness; it was awful! Now, if Harlow cries excessively, I’ll try everything to find a solution (usually swinging her gently around in my arms works). If she doesn’t stop crying, I’ll just bounce and ‘shush’ until she does, or I’ll talk to her in a really calm voice and tell her it’s okay. It must be frustrating for you both. A little human who can’t talk, but who would probably do anything to be able to talk! A big human who just wants to understand but can’t. It’s a recipe for disaster.
Anyway, listen. You’re doing well. So much better than you probably think. I hate to say it, because I know how annoying it can be to have it mentioned, but your hormones are going to be all over the place, and you’re going to be two extremes within seconds. You have created a wonderful little being, and these times pass. It will be unlikely that they’ll have another episode like the one right now for a little while, and even if they have one two days apart, does it really matter all that much? You’ll get over it, so will they and it’ll all be forgotten at one point. You are a great parent, and we both know that you love the little mite so much, even when you feel like you could pack the job in forever. There is no love quite like the one you both share.
You’re doing so well!