I will admit, this isn’t the first blog I’ve done. In fact, this is my third. I’m crossing my fingers and toes that it will be third time lucky and I’ll fall in love with this blog just like I did with my first.
I feel as if I should really spend this first post introducing myself, instead of rolling straight into the deep end and talking about my pregnancy. Then I thought; HEY! Why not do both?
I’m 21 years old.
I live in a city in South Wales.
Okay, so I’m 35 weeks pregnant (9/10/2017) and I’m due on the 13th November with a little girl. To be honest, I was half surprised and half not with finding out. A single parent? Sure. But could I? My head did go all over the place with doubts. Then I would look back to my childhood and how good my Dad had been as a singleton, and it didn’t seem so bad.
I found out on the 10th March 2017, shortly after my Dad had left my house for the day (he’d stayed over the night before for a Chinese and movie night).
The first signs? I ate more than my 20+ stone Dad, felt bloated all day and the obvious – missed monthly! I took the test, put on a load of washing, returned to it, and there the lines were – dark and screaming in my face. I didn’t really react. I wasn’t happy and I wasn’t sad. I was shocked? Possibly. I don’t really remember. All I knew, is that I was terrified of telling my Dad. I messaged him saying that I’d be over that evening and that I had some news.
“You’re either pregnant or you’ve hurt someone.”
I wrote a card, and put another little card inside.
“Thanks for being a great Dad, but it’s now time to be a Grandad.”
I was VERY sheepish handing it over, and to be honest, he didn’t react either. I was slightly offended that he didn’t jump for joy as I’d hoped he would, but then I’ve come to the realisation that my Dad just isn’t like that. He sat me down and asked me about it, then gave me an hour lecture; which I actually really appreciated. I went home that night and barely slept; I was going to be a mother.
It was the next day when I told my manager in work.
“Do you like hugs? Can I give you one?”
I’m actually a HUGE hugger, and that was nice too, but it honestly just made it all seem so much more real.
Time went by and I didn’t feel any different. I guess I expected to expand to a 40 week size overnight, and I think that’s why it’s felt as if it’s gone so slow.
I found out that every female in my family had had miscarriages, and so I began to panic. That was; until my 12 week scan.
Everything was fine, and I already had a little stubborn baby on my hands – she wouldn’t move to be measured. Then she kicked her little legs out for a stretch! My dad came with me and I THINK I saw a slight bit of emotion. I was now SO ready for the rest of this pregnancy.
To be honest, I haven’t been as careful as everything thinks you should be on any pregnancy – let alone your first. I’ve eaten all the foods I would usually eat, I’ve walked 10 times more and (now this is naughty) I’ve smoked. Yet I’m carrying a healthy little girl.
I’m now at the stage where morning sickness is driving me insane and I can barely sleep through her kicks, but these next 5 weeks can’t go any quicker. With the support I have from my Dad, to the loving and strong people I have in my workplace, I know that my daughter will live a happy and content life and I will bend over backwards to ensure that too.
I’ve decided to name her Harlow. It’s just the middle name I’m struggling on – Rose or Rae.
I’m honestly over the moon to finally have my little bundle of joy in my arms and to bring her home. I’ll also be moving within the next 2 weeks into the home that she’ll be spending some time in and I can’t wait to make it the way it should be for us both.
I know Harlow will be the best thing to ever happen to me.